Accepting Limits and Asking For Help

Saturday,  June 22, 2013

Since it was Saturday, my faithful housekeeper came.  It is always a delight to see her.  She loves the Lord and is not ashamed to say so.  She always cares how I am.  And she is an excellent housekeeper.  I have an allergy to dust.  She doesn't.  She loves to dust.  I am delighted.  But today I was glad to see her because there are so many chores I can't do right now.  In the four hours she was here, she was like a whirlwind and got things shaped up.  What a blessing.

It was a busy day for everyone around me, but not really for me.  I had a sleepless night.  I had an enjoyable on line chat with one of my daughters-in-law last night and after that I got ready for bed.  It was about midnight.  I could not get comfortable.  Much tossing and very little turning since I can't sleep on my left side, and at 5:00 a.m. I got up and moved to the recliner and fell asleep about 5:30 until 7:15.  The housekeeper arrived about 7:45.  Ron left about 8:30 to go pick up our oldest grandson at Boy Scout camp. 

From camp, Ron had an emergency job for a customer, so they went there and started it but he was going to have to get supplies to finish it.  Next they went to Sears to get the window air conditioner unit he had ordered for his mom to replace one of hers.  They went to her house and did that job.  Some where in those errands they got bird seed for my feeders at home and finally picked up pizza for our lunch.

Meantime, while the housekeeper worked and Ron and our grandson worked, I did little.  I  got a load of laundry started, but couldn't get it out of the dryer (had to ask for help).  Made a fruit salad (almost, but couldn't open the jar of cherries to go in it and had to ask for help).  Loaded and unloaded the dishwasher, but had to leave a few items on counter (and ask for help later to put away the heavy ones). 

I used the hose to rinse the windows that overlook my yard, so I could take bird photos without the camera focusing on the dirty spots instead of the birds, (but had to ask for help to really get them clean).   The grass was getting deep in the back yard and that has always been a chore I loved to do (but this time I would have to ask for help).




The guys arrived with the pizza and we had a good time laughing about camp stories with our grandson.  I asked if he found any new friends while Grandpa asked if he lost any friends.  After lunch, Ron went to the office and got the additional tools and parts to finish the job for the customer while my grandson mowed the back yard and cleaned the windows with that super smile you see even when it was about 95 degrees outside! 

Ron got back with the tools for his job, and together the guys filled the feeders and bird baths to keep the birds and Grandma happy.  They also filled the ponds.







 


Next they transplanted one hanging basket plant.  The birds had been taking the lining out of the basket for nesting material.  The guys had a good time working together and probably joked about Grandma being a perfectionist.  But they had fun.






They left and went to finish the job started earlier in the day for a customer.  Then Ron took our grandson to his other grandmother's house where his aunt was waiting to take him swimming.  He is bound to have enjoyed that after a week at camp and a busy day of helping.

Once Ron got home, I needed his help to go buy groceries.  I can't drive, can't push the basket easily, and found I couldn't even tear off the plastic bag from the roll for the fruit I wanted to buy.  Although I got to laugh when Ron also struggled with it.  They sometimes are really hard to tear.  We just got a few things.  I knew he was exhausted and I had battled an upset stomach much of the day.

We got home and I put supper in a pot (but had to ask for help to put it in the oven).  I told Ron that supper would be in 30 minutes, so he headed to a cleansing bath.  I got the table ready.  Made tea.  Cooked cauliflower and waited for him (I need to ask for help to get supper out of the oven and to open that jar of cherries for the fruit salad).  So while he lost all track of time, I waited and waited.  Eventually we had our supper and it was my turn for a bath (but I had to ask for help getting in and out of the tub safely). 

 In life and in marriage we all know we need to help one another.  It is part of life and it is part of God's plan.  When God created Eve for Adam, it was for a "helpmate"; but I am used to doing at least some of the helping, and not all of the asking.  I know this is temporary; my daughter-in-law reminded me of that tonight.  But some days it gets hard to ask for each thing you need.  We don't
"keep score", so why is it so hard?  A lot of it is pride.  We don't want to appear weak.  Sometimes people feel the other person IS keeping score, but not at my house.  It is just being more comfortable giving than taking, but sometimes the other person needs to learn to "give" and needs the blessing of giving.  I think I will print out that photo of my grandson's smiling face as he cleaned my windows and try not to feel so useless when I have to ask for help.